Weirdos United
by Jazzimonster
Summary: Love hurts... and the twins, Leon and Squall, learn this the hard way when they meet Cloud's three right hand men... or shall we say WOMEN? You know everything's more complicated when women are involved. L/SxC and side AkuRoku. R&R!
1. Prologue

**Title:** Weirdos United

**Author:** Asaria

**Co-Author and Editor:** Roxeen

**Disclaimer:** Dudes aren't mine, they belong to their respective owners, but we do own Sini, Yuun, and Faye!

**Pairing:** Leon/Squall x Cloud, funny OOC

**Summary:** Love hurts, and the twins, Leon and Squall, learn this the hard way when they meet Cloud's three right hand men... Or shall we say WOMEN? You know everything is more complicated when females are involved.

**Authors' Notes:** Yes, you read right. Leon and Squall are two different people in this story and they happen to be twins. Yes, we are cuckoo bananas. Complaints? Join the club. We really want to hear your opinions ((or complaints)), so that we can improve the story. So please make sure to R & R! Thanks!

* * *

-:P R O L O G U E:-

* * *

She reached for her cell phone, the cute twinkling melody cutting through the silence. She tucked her hair behind her ear and stood there listening for a moment, her expression serious and professional. She gave him one single look, signaling she'd be back in a moment and left without another word.

The door shut. Time passed. A wave of calm spread.

Time seemed to be his greatest enemy for it felt as if dinosaurs had roamed the earth, cavemen had discovered fire, and the light bulb was invented in all the time he spent in that one room.

Cloud sat at his desk, stacks of checks, mountains of paperwork, and towers of contracts surrounding him from all sides, swallowing him into an abyss of unfinished business. The quiet ambiance of the little office simply included the ticking of the clock mixed with the humming of a hibernating laptop. So slow and calm that every stroke of the pencil could be heard clearly throughout the room. Cloud couldn't take the undisturbed silence any longer, he had to shatter it if he was planning to keep his sanity. He just had to...

He smacked his head against his desk. Again. And again. And again. And one more time for good measure. Turning his head to the side, cheek against the flat surface, he reached for the mouse and moved it slightly. The laptop whirred back to life as the screen brightened up, it looked like Cloud would have his chance. A beep came from the speakers as a pop-up box appeared. Username: Faye Tempest... He shifted his gaze to the blinking cursor, password waiting to be filled. Faye: 1, Cloud: 0... There was no way he'd be able to guess her password. It was probably some long word from the dictionary never meant to be heard by human ears, knowing her... Damn.

He glared at the check laying before him. Blue eyes burned invisible lasers into the seemly innocent letters and numbers, his imagination watching it burst into a fiery display of reds and oranges. The blond faced the other way, his chin placed at the edge, admiring all that there was on the other side of that large window. He breathed a deep and forlorn sigh, oh how much he wanted to jump out of that window at that moment in time just to escape the intolerable torture bestowed upon him.

Cloud then leaned back into his chair and scrunched his nose as he glanced at the ceiling... He immediately met eyes with the smiley face drawn on a poster, with the words "You should be working, Cloudster" written in his assistant's flowery cursive letters, little hearts and rainbows sprinkled around the page. It obviously couldn't be taken seriously, but regardless it annoyed him to no end.

He lowered his head back to view the check in front of him and he began to doodle, turning the numbers into stick people and letters into funny, misshapen animals. The blond then looked up from his work once again, sensing the eternal silence and a smile slowly crept up on his features. Quietly pushing his rolling chair back, he paused listening for the footsteps of his beloved assistant. Nothing... just silence. He slowly made his way towards the door, tiptoeing to a halt. Silence was still his only witness. Cloud grasped the handle. It seemed to glow in his eyes, a heavenly item that was the key to his escape... So close and in his grasp. If possible, his grin got even wider.

With a bursting leap of joy, Cloud internally sang out "Freedom!" and practically ripped the door open... Only to come face to face with his favorite psychotic bodyguard, Yuun.

Cloud immediately very well became an ice sculpture, hand numb on the knob, frozen in mid-step, with his eyes wide holding a blank look, and his grin slowly melting away. Practically a billion thoughts filled his already over-packed Chocobo head, most of them dealing with words that pirates and sailors seemed to favor. And as if it could get any worse, Cloud felt his inner self breaking down into little pieces, wailing as if he had been whacked with a 10,000 pound sledgehammer. Yuun raised an eyebrow at the shorter blond.

With her signature frown and stoic expression, she tapped the boy on the head and asked, "What are you doing, Cloudy?"

The question seemed to cut into Cloud, snapping him from his stupor. "Eh... um..."

His first reaction was to refer to his mental filing cabinet of excuses that were conveniently alphabetized and organized by situation. Only some excuses worked on some people, so he had to select wisely. He had to be clever. It had to be something completely believable and able to rescue him from this awkward position.

"I have to go to the bathroom?" He cursed at how the statement sounded more like a question. Well, at least he tried... It'd take a miracle to get past the human lie detector anyways.

In a blink of an eye, Yuun's face of boredom transformed into a smile so bright, Cloud was momentarily blinded. Yuun giggled, "Aww, you're so cute... Too bad the bathroom isn't this way, huh?" and gave him a huge glomp, upsetting his balance and causing him to almost fall over. She was squeezing the breath out of the poor boy. Cloud frowned, not wanting to upset Yuun. He thought it wise to stay silent about his major dislike of hugs... Especially when the girl hugging him was holding a weapon.

She then leaned down to his ear and whispered, "Besides, you aren't cute enough for me to let you skip work and face the wrath of Faye. In fact, you should really be thanking me for stopping you."

Cloud pulled away, pouting, using his ultimate weapon of puppy dog eyes. Yuun knew more than anyone, the power of those big blue eyes, and if she met with the gaze, she would give in and allow him to escape. So she quickly averted her gaze, pretending to deal with a stubborn smudge on her weapon, licking her thumb and rubbing it off.

Cloud knew that no one was strong enough to not fall for it, except for Faye, who grew immune after excessive exposure, so he thought quickly and began to tug on her sleeve as cute as he could possibly be.

Yuun quickly brushed it off and aimed her flame-thrower at Cloud's forehead. "Move," she insisted with a small smirk. Knowing the drill, Cloud sighed and marched back into his own little prison cell, feeling Pookie being nudged between his shoulder blades.

Yuun marched close behind Cloud all the way to his chair and she decided to go ahead and stick around in case he tried anything funny. "So how's progress?" Yuun asked, peering over the blond's shoulder.

After not receiving an answer, she picked up a few loose papers and began to inspect his work and fell across Cloud's doodles of ultimate boredom. Little people, animals, and... She smiled, weapons. She flipped to the next page to read Cloud's essay on maintaining a successful business and laughed, "You know you spelled business wrong, right Cloudy?"

"Eh..." Cloud mumbled. If he had done it on the laptop, he could have spellchecked it. But no, Faye wouldn't let him log on to her computer... He took a check he had done incorrectly from one of the various piles and placed it in his palm. He blew lightly and allowed the piece of paper to float slowly across the room, gliding over all the work that had to be done, only to land on Faye's home-schooling textbooks. Cloud shuddered knowing that it was implying something.

The bodyguard winced. Faye did seem to be a lot tougher on the spiky-headed blond this year than the last. She guessed that it was probably due to the horrible events that took place on the day of September 13, nearly two years ago, also known as the day that Cloud had driven Faye off the edge. Faye wasn't one to break down... She was naturally hard working and worked well under pressure to a back breaking point. Snapping just wasn't an option for her. But there's always a first... and that first was on that unfortunate Friday.

Cloud's random urges to escape are anything but new to the group. He constantly came up with the strangest of methods to get away from his work and Faye tended to suffer the most when he successfully broke out, mostly because he was her biggest responsibility. It was probably the third time he tried to make a break for it that week and because Yuun was on vacation at that moment in time, he triumphed and got out with no problems or obstacles. Guess third time is the charm. The crazy woman was most likely at a shooting range, perfecting her aiming accuracy, the last thing on her mind was that Cloud would be dumb enough to leave without a proper escort. Boy, was she wrong...

The only warning he got when he was caught was a sudden flash of murderous brown curls, appearing out of nowhere, in his view, followed by a couple of hits on the head with Faye's fighting fan. Faye was intimidating when she wasn't angry... So you could only imagine how much he regretted to decide to escape on _that_ day and at _that_ time.

Faye had cornered Cloud and demanded that if he were to be forgiven, he had to wear Sini's newest design as punishment. It didn't seem like such a bad thing until Cloud set his eyes onto said dress... The wretched thing was in fact a simple purple kimono, lined with a strip of lilac with white petals scattered around with an obi to match. It wasn't an ugly dress, it's just that he rather much see Faye or Sini in it than himself. And to add icing on the cake, Faye had gotten some man sized pumps on short notice and insisted that a wig was to be worn to compliment his "feminine features". Last but not least, he was to make a speech in front of the most important clients of Strife Delivery Service and talk about the new improvements and service options that they would be offering. Surprisingly, clients were more twisted than they originally thought and word gets around pretty quick because SDS had ten times more deliveries requested that month.

He will indeed never anger Faye again... For he surely does not want to experience such a below the belt hit to his manliness any more... But apparently, that doesn't mean he'll give up. He'll just have to plan things out better.

Suddenly, a knock broke Yuun's train of thought. By instinct, she quickly stood up and pointed her Pookie towards the door.

The door slowly opened, but no one entered. Cloud and Yuun looked at each other and then curiously stared at the half-opened door, wondering if they has just both imagined the knocking and that the force of the A/C had caused the event.

"Yes Mr. Strife... Definitely," a familiar voice assured. "I'll be sure to inform your son. You can count on me... Thank you, Mr. Strife. Have a nice day." As Faye stepped into view, she pressed a button on her wireless headset and a small beep sounded, ending the phone conversation. With her other hand, she was typing on her touch screen palm pilot, surely inserting more events for Cloud to attend and more things to do. Lucky him...

"Hey, Faye. Just wanted to know how Cloudy was doing." Yuun grinned, pointing her thumb towards the blond. "Blondy here was just complaining on how little work you're giving him."

Faye giggled, "Oh really, Cloudster? I guess I'll just have to give you some more. I'm sure that could be arranged, so no worries." She placed the palm pilot on it's belt clip, sitting at her hip.

Cloud frowned at the comment. "No way! You kidding? I'm practically buried in this stuff!" he retorted.

Faye tilted her head to one side and smiled, "Just kidding, Cloudster. I would never be that mean... Not if I don't have to be anyways." She shrugged her shoulders and rolled her eyes, "I guess then maybe I should tell you later about you-know-what."

"So that's why it took you so long? You were on the phone talking about you-know-what?" Yuun smirked, enjoying keeping a little secret from Cloud.

"Sure was." Faye replied with a wink.

Cloud's brows knitted. What were they talking about? He couldn't fight the urge to ask.

"Anyways..." Faye stretched the word dramatically, snapping her head to Cloud. "That's the least of our concerns right now, Cloud." She pulled out the palm pilot, "We have work to do."

Cloud's eyes widened and he gulped. If there was anything that he knew about Faye, it's that when she uses his proper birth-given name and she takes out that palm pilot of hers... He better get ready for the worst.

The brunette took Cloud's wrist and dragged him to Mount Everwork. "Hmm... You never did learn how to balance checks and accounts correctly," she frowned as she flipped through a small pile. "Better work on that."

She shook her head in mock shame, "But right after we review the past presidents of the corporation and then the basics of delivery. Oh and of course, we can't forget that report you wrote for me. Plus, I need you to address to the coke machine issue the employees have been having lately. Yes and at 5:15 on Wednesday, we need to attend that meeting with our rival company!" She let out a small squeak, "Goodness, how silly of me! I almost forgot the wed... Cloud?"

Cloud's head was flopped onto his desk, quiet snoring erupting from his mouth. Faye's schedules were Cloud's lullabies. If anything could lull him to sleep, Faye's constant ranting could.

Faye's brown eyebrow twitched as she glared at the blond. She looked at the desk and saw a pile of textbooks from which she quietly pulled out a book right from the middle. The books tumbled down, causing the large thump to violently wake the sleeping blond.

"Oh look, you're awake." she smiled and then before he could regain composure, the serious expression graced her features again, "Come on, Cloud. We have to finish today!"

Cloud groaned and heaved a drawn out sigh, honestly, how did such a serious and formal human being ever spawn onto this earth? Cloud would never know.

Just then, the door burst open as Sini stomped in, an "urge to kill" look plastered on her face and an evil aura seeping from her entire body.

Cloud wore a smug smile, not detectable by anyone, thanks to Sini, of course.

"Um... Sini? What are you doing here?" Faye looked genuinely surprised, "Aren't you suppose to be making the outfits for the... you-know-what?"

"Someone. Stole. Them!!" Sini screeched, emphasizing each and every word.

Yuun blinked, "Stole what?"

"My _absolute_ favorite knitting needles!! Those precious lime green, smooth, shiny, most prized needles of mine that I have owned since forever!!" She was obviously miffed that no one knew what she was talking about.

Yuun and Faye's eyes bulged. Someone took Sini's good luck needles? They could feel a funeral coming up soon. No one touches Sini's knitting needles if they are planning to live a good, long life.

"S-Sini. Calm down for a minute!" Faye stuttered, seeing Sini aggressively throw papers around in search for her precious possession. "Who do you think would try to take your knitting needles? I mean, maybe you misplaced them?"

Sini let out a bark of cold laughter, "Me? Lose them? HA!" Faye backed off on that theory, someone must have certainly taken them.

"Who would steal Sini's prized utensils of tailoring...?" Faye pondered out loud, passing through all her employee contacts on her palm pilot. "Better yet... who's foolish enough?" she thought to herself, tapping her pencil on the desk.

Yuun crossed her arms and closed her eyes, "Well, I could interrogate every employee and threaten them with good old Pookie. That will probably get them back."

"Now, let's not resort to violence, Yuun." Faye pleaded. She sensed Sini's tension and decided to take action. She knew there was no other choice, a calm Sini is a happy Sini. If she continued on this outrageous quest for possible suspects, surely someone would get hurt. It was for the good of the employees and Sini. "Alright, we'll go ahead and deal with this situation first," she slammed her fist into her palm, "And then we can get back on track... Okay, Cloud?"

Faye got no response, not even a whiney one.

"Cloud?" Faye looked over her shoulder, only to find the dotted outline of where the Strife heir once stood. "He's gone!"

The girls stared in shock as a random tumbleweed blew past them slowly.

"Where the hell did that come from?" Yuun sweat-dropped.

A man no older than 30 walked into view and picked up the tumbleweed. He flashed a silly smile at the group. "Sorry 'bout that, ladies. Didn't mean to drop it." he spoke in a thick Southern accent.

"Oh sir... Is there any chance you've seen some large green knitting needles anywhere?" Faye calmly questioned, "Sini can't seem to find them."

"That crazy gal lost her knittin' needles? How? Them are some huge ass knittin' needles. Them thangs could probably protect you from vampires." he drawled. Seeing that he was no longer needed, he quickly excused himself. "Sorry Miss Tempest. Well I'll see ya'll, got a delivery to make." He waved his good bye.

"...How convenient..." Faye spoke under her breath.

"Who hired him?" Sini asked, wanting to know why in the world he was working there.

"Better question... Why is he delivering a tumble weed?" Yuun pointed out.

The girls would never know.

* * *

**A/N:** Here are the OC descriptions...

**Faye Tempest**  
Occupation: Manager/Adviser  
Eyes: Brown  
Hair: Short Brown  
Likes: Cloud on task

**Nimbus Yuun  
**Occupation: Bodyguard  
Eyes: Hazel  
Hair: Medium Black  
Likes: Cloud and Pookie

**Sini Tottori  
**Occupation: Tailor  
Eyes: Blue  
Hair: Long Blonde  
Likes: Crossdressing Cloud


	2. One : Double Trouble

**Title:** Weirdos United

**Author:** Asaria

**Co-Author and Editor:** Roxeen

**Disclaimer:** Dudes aren't mine, they belong to their respective owners, but we do own Sini, Yuun, and Faye!

**Pairing:** Leon/Squall x Cloud, side AkuRoku, funny OOC

**Summary:** Love hurts... and the twins, Leon and Squall, learn this the hard way when they meet Cloud's three right hand men... or shall we say WOMEN?

**Authors' Notes:** Yes, you read right. Leon and Squall are two different people in this story and they happen to be twins. Yes, we are cuckoo bananas. Complaints? Join the club. Enjoy the story!

* * *

-:D O U B L E . T R O U B L E:-

* * *

After making idle talk with a couple of employees and convincing the mechanic that he was merely inspecting the motorcycles as Faye had ordered, for no one in the right mind defies the brunette, he stealthily sneaked into the Strife garage building. He began to admire the mechanical marvels lined up orderly before him, each and every motorcycle carefully parked in their marked locations. There was just something so wrong about them being used to just deliver packages.

He plopped onto one of the older models, never even daring to commit the sin of breaking one of those newer ones. Revving up the engine, he carefully placed his sunglasses at the top of his nose and started up the bike.

"I hope they won't be too mad if I'm late..." he said to himself before kicking off and riding out of the garage. Cloud grinned as he turned his head to look back at the disappearing Strife Delivery Service building.

* * *

Huge dust trails closely followed the roaring vehicle, tires screeching against the hot road. The blond stopped at a red light and pulled out the directions he had printed out earlier that day. "Right at Ruby St. and left at Emerald Ave... Got it." He nodded and then continued his way to his final destination.

When he spotted the parking lot, his eyes scanned for a free spot. He knew this would happen. The blond fought the urge to park in a handicapped space and swerved perfectly into a single empty parking space, dust clouds slowly clearing with tire tracks found in it's wake.

Swiftly, he jumped off the motorcycle and began sprinting towards the parking lot's building. Footsteps hitting hard against the gravel, the blond took off his sunglasses and blinked a few times to clear his vision. He looked at the large letters on the building, "Hollow Bastion University, this is it." And Yuun said he wouldn't possibly ever be able to follow directions correctly... Proves her wrong.

He mentally gave himself a pat on the back when an electronic bell began to chime from within the building. He looked down from the sign to his watch. "Great, first day and I'm going to be late!" The blond hammered up the flight of steps and quickly threw the entrance door open.

Cloud ran down the large foyer hall, stopping every now and then to admire the displays, allowing a couple of ooo's and ah's to escape his lips. Shaking his head, blond spikes bouncing side to side, he murmured, "Stay focused, Cloud! You don't have time for this. You're late, remember?" and he took off again. Cloud came at a crossing and he looked around in all directions. He couldn't remember which direction to go and in response to this realization he tilted his head slightly in frustration.

His expression of irritation soon softened into a pout. The blond crossed his arms across his chest, "Which way was was my first class again...?" He looked to his watch again as if it would give him an answer. "If this keeps up, I'm going to have to find my second class soon," he tapped his foot in thought, the sound of his boots against the floor echoing down the long hallways.

Cloud came to the decision of retracing his footsteps. Did he happen to pass by an office or something? He couldn't possibly risk the chance of embarrassing himself by stepping into any classroom and asking for directions. The blond was so busy with the troubling situation before him, he didn't even notice the two young men walking towards him from the opposite hallway. But then again, they didn't notice Cloud either.

"I told you it was the North Hallway..." one man grumbled, a scowl plastered on his face. He rolled his eyes as his voice took on a mocking quality, "It's South. I know it is. Don't blame me if you go North and become late on the first day." He then continued to speak normally, "Please... Tell me again why I even bother going to class with you?"

"Actually, I was correct to begin with. It really isn't my fault that this stupid college decided to name their hallways North, East, South, and West, when the real direction is completely opposite." the other snapped back, his eyes narrowed in annoyance.

The first man quickly reviewed the directions a teacher had written for him and without looking at his source of irritation responded, "Don't try to not take responsibility for this mess you got us in." He let out a small chuckle, "You better be expecting to pay for both our lunches because of this."

"Hah! The only person I ever treat to anything is me... and myself."

As their bickering started to raise in volume, Cloud snapped out of his dazed train of thought. His head immediately snapped up to attention, eyes quickly catching sight of the two people. A smile appeared. Both of them appeared to be identical to the other, possibly twins? He unconsciously picked out the differences between them. One had shoulder length hair while the other had a more cropped haircut, plus their jackets sported different sleeve lengths... Wait, jackets?

"How could they wear those clothes in the summer?" Cloud wondered to himself. He shook his head again. Okay, so maybe Faye was right. The blond did have some form of ADD. Knowing that now was probably not the best time to be questioning the fashion sense of two complete strangers, Cloud quietly walked up to the arguing brothers.

"Okay, for example, remember the time when we were invited to Rinoa's party? You also gave me the wrong directions then. Admit it, you have no sense of direction whatsoever."

Cloud winced. Maybe asking these guys wouldn't help him out after all. They seemed to be as lost as he was. Maybe twice as lost. But nonetheless, there was the chance they could lead each other in the right direction. The blond attempted to get their attention, "Um, excuse--"

"Me? I specifically told you to turn left and you went right."

"Hello? I'm sorry to bother you but..." he tried louder.

"No, I asked left and you answered right. The fault is yours."

"I'm lost, can you two plea-" the blond attempted again.

"I meant right as in correct, not the direction. It's really a shame that you can't comprehend something as simple as that."

Cloud scowled, if this didn't get their attention... Nothing would. He took a deep breath, channeled all his energy, and yelled, "EXCUSE ME?!"

Mission accomplished.

The short haired man had his mouth open, prepared to release another retort at his twin, but he froze at the blond's sudden interruption. Both men turned their attention to the shorter man before them and quickly gave him a look over. How did such a small person deliver such a loud yell?

Their expressions quickly sobered as they glanced at each other. It seemed as if they were communicating with one another without actually speaking. Why didn't they do that earlier when they were arguing?

Cloud sported a look of confusion as the two brunets suddenly huddled.

The twins were apparently discussing something in hushed tones, facing the wall with their back to Cloud. The blond began to feel rather uncomfortable. Did he do something? Or worse, did they recognize just who he was? He just really hoped that the weirdoes Yuun had warned him about were just some way to keep him from leaving without someone accompanying him. He'd hate to have to call for help, proving he couldn't take care of himself as Faye had predicted...

Speaking of Faye...

* * *

"I can't believe it. He got away, right under our very noses!" Yuun slammed her fists onto the desk. Sometimes the desk wondered why he put up with such horrible abuse. "What kind of bodyguard am I?!"

Faye looked up from the pile of papers she was attempting to organize and gave her friend a small sympathetic smile, "Don't be so hard on yourself. We'll find him."

"Found something!" Sini shouted excitedly. She quickly approached the others with a calendar in her hands. The blonde shoved the calendar into Faye's arms and smirked, "Am I amazing or am i amazing?"

Adjusting the object in question to be better observed, the brunette fingered the cover and then flipped it back and forth, a look of confusion on her features, "The calendar I gave Cloud for his birthday?"

Sini formally introduced her palm to her face. "Look inside," she urged. Yuun took the calendar from Faye and flipped to the day's date. She quickly scanned the contents and let out a small sound of satisfaction, "Guess he used your calendar after all, Faye."

"I know... I'm as surprised as you are." the designer crossed her arms. "He never uses my gifts..." she muttered under her breath. But of course, Sini's presents always involved frills, the over usage of the color pink, and cute fashion accessories. So who could really blame the guy?

The brunette adjusted herself behind Yuun to see what was written in the calendar. She felt a small smile tug at her lips. "That's our Cloudster."

Yuun tossed the calendar casually onto the desk and shook her head, "It's like he wants us to find him."

Sini walked back into the room having already completely changed her outfit, adjusted her green skirt. "So we going?" she asked with a crazy smirk planted onto her face.

"Planning to blend in?" Yuun raised an eyebrow.

"Oh please... Uniforms are for work..." the blonde scoffed. She headed towards the door and paused for a moment to look over her shoulder, "You coming?"

The assistant walked in front of the desk and leaned against it, "FaYuSi**(1)** in position..."

* * *

He looked at the clock on the wall above where the twins were positioned and was determining whether to tap one of them on the shoulder or run the heck for it. He decided against his better judgment and took a step forward, reaching out to tap the long haired one.

Out of nowhere, the brothers nodded in sync and turned around. The blond jumped at the sudden action. Their stormy grey eyes burned into Cloud's own deep blue ones.

Speak, Cloud, speak! "Ah! Um... Can you two help me find my classroom?" he asked timidly. "_Sheesh, Cloud, couldn't you possibly be more intimidated?_" The blond couldn't exactly figure out what was going on in their heads and he didn't like that. He didn't like that one bit...

The long haired one smirked, "Lost, huh?" He took a step towards Cloud and it took almost all of the blond's wits to not step back. He looked at the man to his left, only to suddenly find the other one on his right with a hand on his shoulder. It pretty much took the remainder of Cloud's might not to step away from the touch. Looks like someone just got themselves into a rather sticky situation.

"Don't worry..." the man trailed off, looking to the blond with a questioning look. A semi-menacing sly grin stayed completely in tact on his handsome face.

"Eh?... Oh! Um, Cloud," the Strife heir squeaked out.

"Don't worry, Cloud..." he repeated, "We'll help you find your way to class in no time. My name is Squall and that fa—..."

Squall appeared to have grown out his hair and swiftly changed his fur collared jacket as he was quickly replaced by the other man in the blink of an eye. "The name's Leon," he replied smoothly, extending his right hand to shake the blond's hand, acting as if he never even knocked over his twin.

Thoroughly pissed, Squall stood up, silently thinking he would get back at Leon for that. He took his place behind Cloud as he suddenly caught a slight whiff of cinnamon and couldn't help but breathe in more of the blond's wonderful scent. Squall tightened his grip on the shorter man, grin turning to smirk, "Well, then, Cloud" he replied, loving the way the boy's name rolled off his tongue, "Let's not waste anymore time lingering here and we'll try and handle this problem."

Before said blond could protest, he was being navigated towards what appeared to be an empty classroom in the East Hallway. "Um... wha? But I..." Cloud found himself stammering. He hadn't even told the brunet what class he was searching for. How could he possibly know the way to go? He was trapped between being rude and following along with whatever the twins' plans to assist were. As he continued to contemplate his pros and cons, he felt his back fall against the door of the empty classroom. A million thoughts ran though the poor blond's head, these people didn't seem to have the intentions of escorting him to his classroom.

Cloud felt a sense of uneasiness begin to overwhelm him as suddenly he turned his head towards a rather familiar sound.

"Cloooooooouuuuuuuuddddddd!!"

A shrill shriek ripped through the air, effectively deafening every poor little baby squirrel, rabbit, bird, chipmunk, and elephant within 100 miles of the school.

Cloud instantly felt dread crawl up his spine as he recognized that voice. That voice could belong to only one person, a person he knew too well...

Leon and Squall turned their heads around to see who dared to call their precious blond's name when suddenly a huge explosion, followed by small sounds of glass hitting concrete, came from the entrance. They watched as Cloud found the opportunity to escape and began running towards the racket. Without a second thought Squall and Leon found themselves following him.

They all skidded to a stop as they saw the dust and debris begin to settle. The main hall's large window that occupied the majority of the wall above the entrance was now broken and in shambles. A figure came through the opening in the window that surely was caused by the explosion. Upon closer inspection, said figure was a young Asian woman armed with a small weapon. She picked off a piece of rubble from her shoulder and looked intent on finding something.

Her calm demeanor was quickly exchanged by what could only be described as a maniac on bunnified drugs. She was shifting from side to side, flinging her weapon recklessly, "Cloud?! Where are you?!"

Cloud shut his eyes in attempt to suddenly become invisible, but thankfully for him, Yuun's grand commotion caused a stir in the school and every single student and faculty member was now gathered to satisfy their curiosity. Blending in would be a horribly easy thing to do now.

Another young women, completely unarmed as it seemed, calmly walked inside from the remains of the entrance door. Her brown eyes gave away how worried and possibly scared she was, "Oh, please do be careful with that, Yuun."

Yuun looked at the brunette in utter disappointment, "What took you so long? And where's Sini?"

Ignoring the first question, she responded with an off-handed wave, "She'll be here, I'm sure. She's probably fixing some large and exaggerated entrance. You know how she is."

The expression of the weapon wielding girl scrunched up at that. She actually planned her entrance as well, but Faye stubbornly suggested to simply use the front door. Can you say boring? Her rescue mission methods were way superior.

The twins looked at the destruction before them in complete shock. Jaws hung low, eyes wide as saucers, not even bothering to flinch when a chunk of the wall crashed down dangerously close to them. Cloud was beyond used to this, and being the only one surprising unfazed, he shoved the gaping twins into the closest room and hoped they'd stay there for their own good.

He leaned against the door he had just placed Squall and Leon in and sighed, either with relief or annoyance. He brought a hand up to his face and agonized what he was about to deal with. The blond stood up, brushed dust from his black buttoned shirt and mentally prepared himself. He knew he was the only living being besides his father with the uncanny ability to putting a stop to his assistant's and bodyguard's antics. Wait, that's only two people... Uh oh.

Yuun ran up to a security guard that seemed to have been recently enjoying his diet of powdered donuts and coffee and grabbed the front of his shirt roughly, "I demand to know if you have seen anyone who looks like this adorable lump of cuteness!" she yelled, shaking the man back and forth like some sort of rag doll, a drawing of an extremely chibified Cloud in her other hand.

Of course, said cop didn't... Correction, _couldn't_ respond. His eyes widened as he began to grasp reality and caught sight of the gun at her side , "Um, miss? Weapons aren't allowed on school property... I'm afraid I'll have to," he gulped, "Escort you...out?"

Yuun protectively brought her Pookie to her chest and screamed, "You monster! How dare you attempt to separate me from my baby!"

Faye quickly came over to rescue the guard from the clutches of Yuun, "Calm down, Yuun!" She placed herself between the guard and her mentally unstable friend. "I'm really sorry... Have you by any chance seen a young man a little taller than me with really spiky hair?"

The crowd separated to reveal three men who fit the very loose description Faye had given, their eyes pleading to be spared whatever horrible fate Yuun could possibly bestow upon them.

"Spikier...and blond." Faye smiled nervously.

Cloud heaved a sigh and decided it was time to make his presence known, when suddenly the large and throughly ill-treated front doors burst open and frankly fell to the floor with a thud. With a gust of air hitting his face, the blond took no time to squeeze his eyes shut once again.

Faye groaned, bringing two fingers up to rub her temples, "This is going to surely cost me my salary..." she murmured. Before anyone could question the meaning of the assistant's words, an annoying high pitched laughing rang in the hallways. Following it was... Surprise, surprise. If you guessed, Sini... You are absolutely correct.

"What in the..." Yuun deadpanned.

Though Sini was known for her insanity at the company, she always seemed to be able to outdo herself every single time. Said tailor flew in Tarzan style, eyes clamped shut, mouth wide open with the sounds of a maniacal laughter that could make a grown men cry, knitting needles flying in every possible direction, nearly impaling innocents. And to tie the knot, she was swinging on a thick chord of yarn. But of course that is only the beginning of the problem... She didn't appear that she would be stopping any time soon without dire consequences.

The blonde girl was beginning to realize that the rush of air against her face was lasting a little bit longer than she anticipated and decided to open her eyes just in time to see...

"CLOUD!" Sini shouted and full blown out body slammed right into the unfortunate Strife heir.

Faye and Yuun's jaws simultaneously dropped and they quickly rushed over to them. Sini sat up and looked around confused. She blinked a couple times and shook her head from the slight distress. After her vision had cleared up a bit, she noticed her two friends running over to her, smiling, she waved at them yelling, "Hey guys! I'm alright, don't worry about me! I landed on something soft!"

"Sini!" Faye snapped.

The blond quirked an eyebrow at Faye's sharp tone, "Well... Thanks a lot for your concern."

Yuun let out a frustrated shout, "Get off Cloud!"

Sini looked confused for a minute until she heard a fairly weak groan of pain coming beneath her. Looking down, she realized she had been sitting atop the one spiky haired chocobo individual they had been searching for.

"Ah! I'm sorry!" she cried and quickly scurried off him. Yuun bent down and brought her hand to his neck, "Pulse normal, breathing regular, two arms, two legs... Healthily alive."

Faye rolled her eyes playfully, "Well of course, it takes a lot more than that to kill my tough Cloud" she kneeled next to him and ruffled the bed of soft blond hair. "You okay, Cloudster? Sini's weight didn't crush you too badly, did it?"

Sini pouted, "That's so rude! I don't weigh... that much."

"Nah, you only eat... a lot." Yuun tsk'ed.

Faye helped Cloud up to his feet and carefully steadied him, wrapping his arm around her shoulder. Her voice barely was above a whisper, knowing that the half-conscious blond probably wouldn't be able to hear her anyways, "Cloud, no more sneaking off to colleges anymore. I know you want to make friends and go to school like normal kids but..." she sighed, "Your future's already planned and it's my job to make sure you're successful in it."

A man wearing a business suit split the crowd in half. From the expression he was wearing on his face, you could guess he wasn't exactly happy with the destruction of his school and the disruption of his classes.

The small brunette, burdened by the weight of her slightly taller friend, attempted to bow with no avail. She carefully reached into her pocket and pulled out a check. "This should cover the damages."

The man looked from Faye to the check and seeing that it was a hefty sum, he carefully slipped it into his front chest pocket and patted it for good measure. He gave the people a stern look, signaling there was nothing else to be seen there and walked away without a word.

Yuun and Sini smiled at their cute Strife heir and decided it was time to head back.

* * *

Inside the classroom and behind a bullet proof glass window, Leon and Squall watched as the trio left with their dearly beloved. Having finally recovered, the twins glared at the three girls that had destroyed a college's main hall just to rescue the boy they had had their eyes fixed upon.

"In a normal situation, getting our prey from girls is no big deal..." Leon mumbled.

Squall nodded in agreement, "But obviously, it seems we're not dealing with normal here. That blonde and Asian seem pretty dangerous, it may be difficult to get close to Cloud with them around.

"Hmm..." Leon's gaze focused upon the brunette carrying Cloud, "That one seems to have more of an intimate relationship with Cloud and doesn't seem like she has anything special about her..."

"Ah..." Squall smirked, "Weakest link."

Leon's face had the same expression copied onto his features when he knew his twin realized what he was getting at.

"Do you guys normally go around planning the demise of girls like this? That's pretty weird." a voice cut in unexpectedly.

They both turned to see a woman with light brown hair curled upwards in the strangest fashion, "Selphie?" they replied in unison.

"The one and only!" she giggled, "At your service, boys. So what's the sitch? Any juicy details of the Strife heir? Did you guys talk to him?" Her grin only grew wider as she asked more questions.

"Wait…Strife? As in Cloud Strife? How do you know his last name? Leon questioned with an eyebrow raised suspiciously.

"Pfft, what have you been living under a rock? That was Cloud Strife, heir to Strife Delivery Service." Getting no conformation that anything was clicking in the boys' heads, she continued. "Mysterious son of the senior Strife? Handsome bachelor entitled to millions of dollars once his father retires? He has his own freakin' web site with a blog!"

"..."

"Fine, if you won't give me a story. I'll have to get it myself." She ran and picked up a small notepad and ran out the door.

They glanced at each other and quickly rose to their feet and ran after the proclaimed queen of gossip.

* * *

Faye had set Cloud, with the help of her friends of course, on the bench outside as they waited for Sini to bring the limo around. Yuun had taken the liberty to drive the motorcycle Cloud had "borrowed" back to the company garage. She lightly touched Cloud's cheek and spoke softly to avoid startling him, "Cloudster? Can you hear me?"

Cloud's eyes slowly opened to reveal a dazed look, his eyelids fluttered as he put the blurry image of his assistant into focus, "Faye?"

"Oh my goodness! I was so worried about you! How could you leave me like that?

Cloud attempted to find the words he was searching for. Seemed Faye was more worried than angry. "Well..." he paused, "You can kinda be a bit demanding, Faye."

The brunette let out a sigh. "But Cloudster, you know this type of thing takes time and commitment..."

Cloud flinched, "It's the commitment I'm afraid of."

"You promised me your commitment 24/7! How will we do it otherwise?"

Ugh... Now he felt that stupid guilt. It wasn't her fault. She was only doing as she was told. If anyone was responsible, it was that father of his... He managed a smile, "Fine, fine, I'll do it. Only because you're my..."

The limousine pulled into view and promptly honked, cutting Cloud off.

Maybe it was that Cloud was still woozy, but did he just hear a curse come from that bush?

The tinted window of the limousine lowered and revealed Sini looking a bit impatient. "Come on, Cloudette. Time to get a move on!"

The blond felt his face heat up, "I told you not to call me that!"

A small beep was heard coming from Faye's direction. How she figured out which device was beeping was a mystery to the blond. But whatever it was, he was sure it meant that he wouldn't be able to head home and sleep the rest of the day.

"Oh no! We'll be late for the wedding if we don't hurry! They're all waiting!" Faye grabbed Cloud's wrist and promptly ran towards the limo with Cloud in tow.

"Slow down, Faye. It's not like they'll start without us!"

Once the vehicle was out of the range of the school, Selphie popped up from behind the bush writing furiously. "This is a definite scoop! Faye Strife, eh?" she squealed and started chewing on her eraser. She stuck her pencil up in the air in victory, "I'll call it... "Strife Heir's Heart Goes out to Commoner" or maybe "Strife gets Hitched!" She paused, "What do you guys think?"

Leon's face was twisted into a scowl, "Wedding?"

Squall's expression mirrored Leon's, "Cloud and Faye? She's his fiancee?!"

"We've got a wedding to crash!"

* * *

**A/N:** Hope you liked it! :D Oh and by the way, someone mentioned they didn't know what SDS stood for. It's Strife's Delivery Service. We'd both love to hear from you. We want to make sure that everything is to your enjoyment. One thing we're worried about is our OCs. Right now they have a pretty big role but they'll eventually become minor roles in the story, so don't worries. Please review with your opinions and ideas!

**(1)** Taken from the idea of YuRiPa in _Final Fantasy X-2_


	3. Two : Wedding Blues

**Title:** Weirdos United

**Author:** Asaria

**Co-Author and Editor:** Roxeen

**Disclaimer:** Dudes aren't mine, they belong to their respective owners, but we do own Sini, Yuun, and Faye!

**Pairing:** Leon/Squall x Cloud, side AkuRoku, funny OOC

**Summary:** Love hurts... and the twins, Leon and Squall, learn this the hard way when they meet Cloud's three right hand men... or shall we say WOMEN?

**Authors' Notes:** Yes, you read right. Leon and Squall are two different people in this story and they happen to be twins. Yes, we are cuckoo bananas. Complaints? Join the club. Enjoy the story!

* * *

-:W E D D I N G . B L U E S:-

* * *

Most people would find a ride in a limousine the most exciting experience of their entire existence. I mean who doesn't dream of popping their head out of a sunroof, waving frantically to anyone and everyone, practically making it your mission to make everyone think that you _must_ be pretty important?

Well, let's just say the limo ride back was to say the least... boring and uneventful. Cloud grumbled into the window, his face pressed up against the glass, watching as the dizzying road passed underneath the vehicle.

Faye and Sini were chatting about the wedding, sharing details on what they were going to wear to the reception. But in Sini's case, she was more concerned with what Cloud was going to be dressed up in.

He lightly tapped his fingers on the window, not making any eye contact with the girls, "Please... It's no big deal. Who cares what I wear? It's just a tuxedo."

Sini gave a light laugh, not filled with happiness, but mischief. "That's where you're wrong." She placed her over sized purse on her lap and pulled out a string of frills, "I just saw these at the store and thought you would look absolutely stunning in a dress made exclusively by _moi_."

Cloud winced. His brain could actually grasp how it would take place. The blond was definitely spending too much time with the likes of this demented seamstress.

Faye was absently flipping through Sini's portfolio, which Sini took with her everywhere in case she ran into a famous designer willing to hire her, and smiled. She pointed a finger at the picture of a Cinderella-esque ball gown. "Don't tell me you designed this with Cloudster in mind?"

Sini shifted in her seat to look over at the portfolio in her friend's lap. The blonde girl suddenly burst into a cackle.

"Um, Sini?" she faltered. As upset as she was at Cloud, she feared for the chocobo-haired man's life.

The blonde turned her head towards Faye slowly, much like in those melodramatic horror movies where the funny guy died first, with a crazed look in her blue eyes. Swiftly bringing up the book to Faye's face, almost hitting the brunette square in the face, Sini's grin got wider.

"This," she exclaimed, "is perfect!"

Confused, the brunette's brown eyes shifted her attention back to the dress displayed before her. It was possibly the most beautiful dress she had ever seen in all of Hollow Bastion. Her fashionista vocabulary would never satisfy the description, but the only way she could describe it was as a strapless dress with a sweetheart neckline and a fully embellished bodice. The layers of tulle were set accordingly to give the dress it's full potential. The dream dress of any girl to wear to an event on which all eyes would be forced on her...

"Who's it for...?" Faye began to ask but trailed off when Sini's sinister smile quirked to one side and gave her a look clearly stating, "_Who do you think?_" The assistant felt her own mouth twitch downward slightly, "_Or boy..._" she sighed, "_At least I'll get a good laugh out of this._" What can she say? The "urge to cross dress pretty boys in pretty dresses" gene must have skipped her generation.

She poked the blond in the side to get his attention, "Cloud dear," she called, her voice sickly sweet

The spiky blond, who continued to huddle in the corner seat of the limo attempting to stay out of whatever plans the girls were up to, instinctively perked up at the sound of his name. He couldn't help it really, but once he realized who exactly was calling him, he slouched back into his miserable "oh woe is me" position and simply nodded to indicate that they had his attention.

Sini and Faye scooted up to Cloud, giving him no chance of escape unless he opened the door his back was to and therefore basically committing suicide; which was in any case was bad.

Faye feigned innocence, "I just realized, Cloud, that I never scheduled time to pick up your tuxedo..."

"And since we don't have time to get one because that would make us late..." Sini continued. She wasn't so good on the innocent part.

"We'll just have to make due with what we have, because you have to dress enchantingly no matter what, right Cloudster?"

They both gave him smiles brimming with anticipation. Cloud sighed and grumbled a whatever, inwardly thinking, "_Have I just dug my own grave?_"

Yes, Cloud. Indeed you have.

The tires scratched against the pavement until it reached to a stop and Yuun swiftly dismounted from the bike, taking her helmet off. She ran to meet her friends at the limo and she knocked on the door to announce her arrival. The door opened so suddenly that she had to jump back. "We're back at the company building!" she sing-songed. "Did I miss anything?"

"Perfect!" Sini dragged a screaming and stubbornly struggling Strife heir out of the parked vehicle.

"I'll fill you in later." Faye winked.

"Give me a hand will ya?" the seamstress demanded, "Cloudette isn't as light as he looks."

The bodyguard took a hold of one of the spiky blond's flailing arms and made sure to glare at anyone who dared to help out him out. No one would get in the way of her fun. She didn't need an explanation, her cross dressing senses were tingling.

Yuun grinned as her imagination began to take flight. The petite blond in an adorable ball dress surrounded by evil predators whose gaze gleamed in hunger and then Yuun jumped to the rescue, laughing manically as she burned them all to crisp with her pookie. The Asian began to chuckle softly with a murderous glint within her hazel eyes. Oh, she'll definitely enjoy this.

* * *

Leon groaned in annoyance as he, his twin, and that obnoxious woman of which he so much rather not be associated with came back to the journalism classroom for the fifth time that day. Squall has his monotonous look as usual, but Leon knew better, if you really looked, Squall's eyebrow was starting to twitch in that way he did when he was near to murdering something. Or in this case, _someone_.

Oblivious, or just plainly ignoring the twins, Selphie plopped herself onto an impressive large leather rolling chair in front of the best laptop money could buy.

For a school journalism class, Selphie took herself with the utmost seriousness. Leon couldn't begin to comprehend on how she managed to buy all the items with the measly school budget she had been given. Must have pulled some strings or blackmailed someone... No offense to the girl, but he went with the latter.

"Hmm..." she tapped a finger against her chin in thought, breaking Leon out of his own, "Should I add the failure of the popular Leonhart twins in my article as well? That would totally get the school's attention."

Squall slammed a fist on the girl's desk, causing her pen container to tip over and spill all the writing utensils over the floor, "Don't you dare involve us in your flock of gossip. If you want to put us in your column, you better start writing about the Leonhart twins successfully crashing one of the most ill-fated weddings in all of history."

"Gossip?" Selphie attempted to look hurt, "Why, how can you accuse innocent me of committing such a thing?" She carefully shifted a stack of newspapers so that it would be parallel to the edge of the desk. "It's merely natural curiosity... with benefits." She stood up, both palms flat on the desk and shrugged with a smile, "I prefer to call it a human interest piece."

Leon rolled his eyes. "Squall, to crash the wedding, don't you think it's necessary to first find out where it's being taken place?" he asked.

Simultaneously, they sprung into action. Squall began to open cabinets and drawers, despite Selphie's protests, and found a phone book. Leon pulled out his cell phone from his pocket, flipped it open and started dialing his own church's number first.

He listened while it rang only once and an extremely chipper voice came to his ears, "_Hello? This is Brother Sora of Twilight Chapel._"

"Sora..." he pinched the bridge of his nose. Here comes the headache. The brunet knew he wasn't the most... well behaved person.

"_Ah, Brother Leon? How are you today? It's so rare to get a call from you. Did you do another sinful deed of molesting a young teenage boy so that you could confess today, but instead called because you were too lazy to come here to the confessionary? Or did Brother Squall hurt an innocent bystander because he looked at him quote unquote funny? Or maybe you're calling because you suspect that there is an event taking place here today and you wish to ruin it for every person who had been waiting for such a happy moment? Or perhaps you...?_"

Leon snapped his phone shut without hesitation and stilled in dead silence. Man, could that boy talk. Leon sent Squall a glare, "I don't care what dad says. There's _no way_ we're going back to Sora's church again..." Squall raised a curious eyebrow at his younger brother (by only two minutes, Leon always reminded him) but decided against asking. "Just give me a number..." Leon sighed.

"Try this one..." the short haired brunet suggested, pointing at a number on a full page ad.

After punching in the number, the phone rang about six times before an irritated voice answered. He should have actually taken it as a sign to hang up...

"_First Destiny Church, Riku speaking..._"

"Hey," Leon placed a hand over the speaker and looked up at his brother who signaled him with a hand wave to go on, "But he sounds pissed..." he mumbled before uncovering his phone.

"_...Is this another one of you guys? You know what the deity that you believe in does to prank callers?_" his voice began to grow in anger.

The long haired twin hastily replied, "Uh, no, I'm not prank calling or anything! Just want to know if there are any weddings being hosted at your chapel... Riku, was it?"

There was a small pause from the other side of the phone.

"_You're kidding me. This has got to be the worst prank call. Well, just because you might be mentally retarded, I'm going to play along because obviously you're really lame at this. No, there are no lovey dovey couples that are going to make a big deal about putting on a ring and then will party until they go drunk and have hangovers together for the rest of their lives. Anyways, practice on your prank calling, you really suck._"

_Beeeeeeeeeeeep_... He hung up.

Leon stared in stunned shock at his cellular device as it continued to innocently drone on with its censoring sounds.

"Well?" Squall queried.

However, he got no answer from his brother for said twin continued to state at his mobile phone like it had asked Leon to tap dance shirtless on the moon. Squall waved a hand in front of the traumatized Leon, hoping for some sort of response.

"You know..." Selphie's voice interrupted them, decorative silver and gray paper folded in half in her hand, "I just happened to pick up a stray invitation that had been dropped right outside our university..."

Squall's head immediately jerked at the mention of the invitation and with stealth that rivaled a ninja, he snatched the card from the girl.

"Why didn't you tell us you had this earlier?" he yelled, thoroughly frustrated.

Selphie sniggered, "Just to tease you Squally-boy. It's way more fun to watch you two normally stoic guys panic."

Shaking his head, he opened the invitation as a satisfied smirk revealed itself when his eyes ran along the answer to his prayers perfectly clear in black and white,

_MR. STRIFE AND COMPANY_

_REQUEST THE HONOUR OF YOUR PRESENCE_

_AT THE HAPPY MARRIAGE OF TWO PEOPLE IN LOVE_

_TUESDAY, THE TWELFTH OF JUNE_

_TWO THOUSAND AND EIGHT_

_AT HALF AFTER SIX O'CLOCK IN THE EVENING_

_RADIANT CATHEDRAL_

_218 NORTH GRAND ROAD_

"Well, this worked out perfect. Hey, Leon! There are some tuxes waiting to be rented by us! Let's get going!" he shouted over his shoulder to his slowly recovering brother.

Finally, now that Leon was snapped out of his daze, he followed his brother out. "Goddamn crazy priests these days..." he mumbled.

Selphie tsk'ed, "When will they ever learn...?" she said to herself softly as she moved the mouse cursor over the tiny button at the bottom of her screen...

"_Submit_".

* * *

"Ahh!! We're finally here!" Sini squealed, lowering the window to peek her head outside. She looked up to the marvel of architecture that was the church of the couple to be married. "Oh, they chose the best place! Radiant Cathedral! I want to get married here one day too!"

Yuun giggled, "Will you ever find a man to marry you in the first place?"

In a rush to playfully slug her friend, the blond hit the top of her head on the roof of the vehicle. She rubbed at the sore spot, "Hush you... Besides, it's not about me today anyway," the blonde huffed and stepped out of the limo.

Yuun and Faye got out from the other side, all three of them dressed for the special occasion, all original designs by the one and only Sini Tottori of course.

Faye's dress called for sophistication and had a shoulder-baring neckline and an asymmetrical hemline in a beautiful baby blue.

Yuun, not being one to wear dresses because she claims they restrain her movements to an extreme, had a scarlet dress with crisscross beaded straps extending to the back at a just below the knee length.

Sini's strapless lime sherbet gown had three wide satin bands that come on the side as dainty bows complete with fish tail hem line.

But seriously, who cares about what the _girls_ are wearing? Let's get back to Cloud.

Faye bent down, looking into the inside of the limo, and tried to usher a certain unwilling someone to come out. With Faye's strength nowhere near Cloud's, she struggled to pull him out. She straightened up and tucked a stray hair behind her ear, "Guys? A little help?"

Sini laughed, placing her hands on her hips, "Can't get the princess out on your own, Faye?"

"I can hear you!" Cloud shouted from the inside.

The brunette sighed, "I'd like to see you do any better... The reason he's not coming out is actually because of what you did to emotionally scar the poor boy."

"I didn't see _you_ complaining about it though," the tailor shot back. In response to this, Faye bit her lip.

Yuun cut in before Faye could retort, "Stop it. It's our special friends' wedding day, let's not ruin it by getting into any stupid arguments." She bent down and rested her forearm on the roof of the car, "And Cloud," her voice dropped to a serious cold tone that sent shivers up their limo driver's spine, "Come out here or I will make you. But we wouldn't want that to happen, now would we?"

It seemed that the blond was convinced that he didn't want to suffer anything the bodyguard had in mind. So he regrettably and very slowly climbed out of the limo, clad in the extravagant midnight blue gown that had replaced the man's non-existent tuxedo.

"Oh my goodness! You look adorable!" Yuun wiped a fake tear, "My little Cloudette is growing up!" she exclaimed, pull poor Cloud into a large rib-crushing hug.

Faye checked her palm pilot and nodded toward them, "Alright, we're a little late, so let's hurry inside and greet everyone before it starts. Everyone have their invitation?" She pulled out her ticket in, "Yuun?"

"Yessum."

"Sini?"

"You betcha, commander."

"Cloud?"

"...Uh..."

"Wrong answer!" Faye snapped, "Where's your invitation?" She tapped her foot in impatience.

"I-I don't know," Cloud stammered as he lifted his full length skirt to see if he had possibly dropped it. "I had it before I went to school, but now I can't find it!"

"Probably left in your pants' back pocket." Sini suggested.

Oh, how the blond missed those pants. Though there was a delightful breeze... No, bad Cloud, bad!

"Eh, I think it'll be okay, Cloud's pretty famous, he should probably be an exception," Yuun shrugged the problem off as if it was an everyday situation. "If not, you could always charm your way in, dear." the bodyguard said gleefully... a little too gleefully.

"Do _whatever_ it takes, we have to get going now," Faye pleaded. So then the group made their way toward the entrance.

"Even if you have to show a little leg..." Sini whispered loud enough behind a cupped hand for the blond to hear.

"I'm _not_ going to show a little leg!"

Introductions were made, hellos were exchanged, and a couple of questioning looks were ignored. People knew too well that the girls were behind all this; it was better that they didn't ask. They would probably most definitely fear the answer anyways.

Several minutes of hectic chatter later, the wedding was finally ready to begin. The crowd soon began to disperse and take their seats within the chapel.

Yuun tried not to trip over herself in her heels as she made her way to the front of the church. As she took a seat in the pew, she gave a sigh of relief that the sharp pain was slowly becoming a dull thud, "I don't see anything wrong with wearing some perfectly comfy sneakers. Heels are torture devices that lead you to a long and painful death..."

Faye fumbled with her electronics, putting them on vibrate one by one, "If heels were so wonderful, men would wear them, Yuunie." The brunette gave a light laugh, "Cloudster would know."

Cloud didn't even bother to grace his assistant with an answer. He was too busy trying to cover his face in sheer mortification. There went his reputation, well the little part that was left since he was introduced to the wonderful world of cross dressing anyways.

Sini cheerfully seated herself next to the blond and beamed in self-satisfaction. Waiting for the bride to come out, she took out her knitting needles and yarn and continued on her most recent project.

Just then, as the two large back doors opened, an organ began to play the first notes of the Bridal Chorus. And there she was. A dazzling vision in white, her chapel train trailing behind her as she walked in tempo to the music. Her face hidden behind a lacy veil and a bouquet of fresh white roses in her hand, she glided across the red isle.

"Oh wow, she looks gorgeous..." Faye breathed.

Sini gleamed in pride, "Obviously. The wedding dress was designed by me."

"Why am I not surprised?" Yuun sighed.

Though he wouldn't ever say it out loud, Cloud was indeed enchanted by the bride's gown as well. It brought out that sort of aura that made everyone feel light and warm inside. What a magical feeling it must be to be the source of that wonderful feeling. Of course, he wasn't thinking of ever wearing something like it... Course not.

The blond was sad to admit that weddings were not very interesting to him. And the pastor was indeed not helping the matter. He was surprised to find that Sini's repetitive knitting patterns were much less boring than Pastor Ansem's "I put you to sleep" voice that carried on and on and on... The spiky blond didn't know how much more he could take. Faye's rants still topped his ultimate boredom list though. The brunette should be honored.

"Is there anyone who thinks this lovely couple should not be wed?" Ansem groused, "Speak now or forever hold your peace."

Suddenly, the sound of heavy doors slamming against the wall was heard throughout the cathedral.

Synchronously, every soul in the building turned their head to face the cause of the disturbance. There stood two people that made Cloud widen his eyes in realization. The very same twins he had encountered that morning at HBU**(1)** had somehow managed to gather the nerve to interrupt a wedding, of all things, his uncle's wedding!

"WE OBJECT!" they roared together, determination in their eyes. Their voices echoed off the walls and the stain glass windows.

Silence flooded the enormous room. One hundred and seventy-two guests completely dumbstruck and speechless... By this time, everyone's jaws had either dropped to the ground or their eyes had popped out of their sockets.

Leon smirked, "_That was cake_," he thought to himself, brushing off invisible dust from his tuxedo.

Squall appeared to have a hint of a smile, convinced that their plan had gone without a hitch. He started to take a step forward, but of course _most_ people should know that acting before thinking is a very stupid thing to do. _Very_ stupid. Guess plan "Rescue Cloud" still had a couple of kinks to it, huh?

"Ex-cuse ME!?" the man across from the bride snarled, and that's when the twins suddenly realized. The groom did indeed have blond hair, but it was no where near as spiky as the man they had fallen head over heels for had. They could be related, but one thing was for sure, that was most definitely NOT Cloud.

The bride followed suit, lifting the veil in front of her face, red lips slightly parted in disbelief. The brothers were hit with surprise again as the blushing bride was not the girl they recently developed a hate for.

"Shit..." Leon cursed under his breath, but then felt a slight nudge at his side. Not wanting to make any sudden movements, he took a side glance at Squall. He saw his brother nudging his head to the side signaling to move his eyes towards that general direction. Following his gaze, he spotted the blond they had been searching for. Cloud was definitely surprised, but not in the way the brothers had hoped he'd be.

Seeing that the groom was still looking at them with 100 percent pure concentrated hatred, Squall quickly spoke up hesitantly, "You've been punk'd?"

"You're not Dashton Mutcher**(2)**!" someone accused, pointing an incriminating finger.

Leon would've very much wanted to hit the back of his brother's head with something very, very hard right now. But it wasn't exactly the time to do so... "Ah, we are truly sorry for disturbing your, uh, wedding... We seemed to have made a mistake!" and the twins then hightailed it out of there with speed that made light cry.

To say that the stillness was awkward would be a complete understatement. But what better hero to save them from this mess than Pastor Ansem?

The bored tone of Ansem could be heard oh so crystal clear as he recited his last lines, "And I now announce thee, Cid and Shera Highwind, husband and wife." He slammed his book closed and ignored the baffled stares, "Thank God it's over with."

And to that, a few scattered amens were heard.

Some people couldn't have said it better themselves...

* * *

**A/N: **A bit of a slow chapter in my opinion. And is it just us or is there something with Hollow Bastion's priests? We are happy to announce we have three awesome possum reviewers! From now on, we'll take the time to say a little something or answer questions. Thanks for the support, guys! Next chapter will have more Boy Lovin' action and some AkuRoku, so sit tight. Also, please vote on our newly made Poll on our account page! :)

A round of applause to **Tobi-Uchiha, Kiemura14, Rikkamaru **for helping us make this story feel more complete with its fans!

**(1) **Short version of Hollow Bastion University.  
**(2) **In the series of _That 70's Show, _Ashton Kutcher (character name: Michael Kelso) always uses the catchphrase of "You've been Punk'd!".


End file.
